Sunday, June 7, 2015

#whywehost #5: because it is practicing Biblical hospitality

Hospitality.                                                              Tim Fair.                                            

You ever have those moments where this particular idea or concept just keeps coming up in conversations with people from different circles in your life?  Usually when something like this happens in my life and I keep having these similar conversations, I know I need to pay attention.  I need to pay attention because I believe that is one way that God is trying to move me somewhere.


Lately the theme has been hospitality.  I read a story a while back that I believe that fits with our call as someone trying to follow after Jesus.  “Going to town one day to sell some items, a man met a crippled man on the roadside, paralyzed in his legs, who asked him where he was going.  The man replied that he was going to town to sell some items.  The crippled man asked, ‘Do me the favor of carrying me there.’  So he carried the crippled man to town.  The crippled man said to him, ‘Put me down where you sell your items.’  He did so.  When he had sold one item, the crippled man asked him what he sold it for and the man told him the price he had sold it for.  The crippled man then said, ‘Buy me a cake,’ and so he did.  When the man sold his second item, the crippled man asked again how much he sold it for and he replied with the price again.  Then the crippled man said, ‘Buy me this,’ and he bought it.  Having now sold all of his items, the man was ready to leave.  The crippled man asked him ‘Are you going back?’  and he replied ‘yes.’  Then the crippled man said, ‘Do me the favor of carrying me back to the place where you found me.’  Once more picking up the crippled man, he carried him back to that place.  Then the crippled man said, ‘Sir, you are filled with divine blessings, in heaven and on earth.’  Raising his eyes up to see the crippled man, he saw no man; it was an angel of the Lord.”

The writer of the letter to the Hebrews encourages us to practice hospitality to strangers, “Do not forget to show hospitality to strangers, for by so doing some people have shown hospitality to angels without knowing it.”  Often times it is difficult to love and include those who do not seem to fit our opinions of the righteous or do not meet our expectations of what we think good behavior is.  The man in the story who was on his way to town to sell some items, did what he was asked to do.  He did it without judging the crippled man and without expectations of something in return.  He simply made himself available to the man and is led, or some would say misled, to a place, maybe even a place he didn’t want to go.  He was making himself available.  Bob Goff often says that people follow availability not vision.  


How available are we to people, and not just to the people in our lives that it is easy and beneficial for us to be available too? 



What I have found is that often when my heart is filled with prejudices, worries and fears, there is often very little room for a stranger or for someone that doesn’t think or act like me.  Henri Nouwen says that “Real hospitality is not exclusive but inclusive, requires a radical openness, and creates a space for a wide range of human experience.”  It can be a scary thing when boundaries that had been there for a long time are pushed out and walls that we had in place for a long time begin to break down.

I understand this to be very true for those of us involved with Safe Families.  We often enter into some relationships with families that live differently than how we may live and make decisions that we may not agree with.  It is often way to easy to simply throw out our opinions and thoughts on how they should live and the decisions they should make without first entering into their story a little bit and learning who they are and how they got to the spot that they are in when we cross paths with them.  Henri Nouwen again says that it gets real when we decide to first enter into this place to “suffer with another in a community of equals in the solidarity of powerlessness.”  Often times the best thing we can offer anyone is to offer the gifts of availability and hospitality.  We get to address our brokenness, live in and from our brokenness because of who Jesus is and the love and grace that he offers us.  And if we have been given anything it’s so that we can give it away.


One of the many things that I am learning, is that I don’t have to wear the hat of judgment or sit on the seat of being a judge.  And neither do you.  We get to offer hospitality to others.  We get to be available to others.  We get to love others well.  Jesus tells us not to judge in Matthew 7:1.  We get to include and invite and love others into this new way of living.  We get to put on display this new life that Jesus offers.  And I believe that one of the more powerful ways we can put that on display is by our hospitality and availability to one another; not only to those who think and act like we do.  As Shane Claiborne said, “unity doesn’t mean uniformity.  God’s unity is about harmonizing, not homogenizing.” 

Jesus tells us that the world will know that we belong to him by how we love.




If you are ready to join the movement and would like to become a host family or approved volunteer, please tell us!  Click Here to fill out our online form, or if you'd like to get your church involved, you can find out how Here.
Contact ejohnson@safefamilies.net for more information about Safe Families in Madison County.


How we found Tim:
Tim Fair is on staff at Bethany Christian Church, as Adult Ministry-Discipleship.  After bumping into at least 3 people who said something to the effect of, "You should try reaching out to Tim Fair at Bethany…"  I finally picked up the phone and called.  That was in September 2014.  Since then, Tim and his wife Courtney have become a host family, along with 3 other families at Bethany.  Bob Bell at Bethany Christian Church has seen God's hand on the this ministry, and chosen to allow their staff members to volunteer their time with Safe Families in a variety of roles.  God is certainly lifting up his people, and his Church, to answer the call and care for families and children in crisis.

Thursday, May 14, 2015

The Kennedy's Story of Giving Back and Jordan's Ride

Cindy and Zane Kennedy are a host family, Safe Families supporter, and never giving up family.

Last year, Safe Families presented at the Kennedy's small church, Markleville North Christian Church.  The Kennedy's soon decided to take a leap of faith and become a host family.  Although they were not quite sure what was on the other side of that commitment, the Kennedy's felt that God had prompted their heart, and they jumped in with two feet to serve families in crisis by caring for children in their home.

Soon the call came from a very nervous mother who was hesitant to use Safe Families, although she would soon be hospitalized with the birth of her 3rd child and had no family members able to keep her two sons during her hospital stay.  Cindy and Zane provided a loving home to these 2 boys who were very anxious about leaving their mother's side.  Cindy was welcoming to the boys and took them to visit their new brother in the hospital.  Cindy held that sweet baby like it was an extension of her own family ~ and in a way it was.

As in many cases, the boys went home and Cindy didn't hear from the boys' mom for quite some time.

Then came Pizza Night at Greeks Pizzeria.  Here in MadCo we get our host families, placing parents and local supporters together and have a quarterly fundraiser night with pizza and music. The Kennedy's invited the mom and her boys ~ pizza night gave them an opportunity to hang out and catch up.

Soon after,  things went down hill for this single-parent family.  She communicated to Cindy that she had lost her job and wasn't sure what her plan was next.  With no car, getting around to look for a new job wasn't easy.

Cindy had a hard time hearing the struggles of this single mom with three kids who seemed to be trying so hard but had so many setbacks.  Cindy said,  "I ask God all the time why some have so much and some have so little."

That's when Cindy got an idea.  She had a friend in the car biz and Cindy and Zane decided to ask their church to help them purchase a car.

This small but faithful church, combined with the Kennedy's help, came up with enough funds to buy this mother a new car.

Cindy recounted to me how she told her of the good news,

"Well, I met with her at the library.  I said,  I have a surprise for ya… after we met for pizza and after you told us that you lost your job, we talked about it and prayed about it and decided that we wanted to help.  The Lord laid it on our heart that you needed a vehicle more than anything else right now, and so we asked our church and our church family came together and we have enough money to buy you a car."

Cindy's eyes became glossy and she said,  "So here we are both sitting in the library crying."

Cindy and Zane took the mother to the car lot to choose a car for the amount that had been donated by this small but incredibly giving church.  When she saw the 2005 Honda Accord with only one owner she kept saying,  "This is so nice!  It just... looks so nice!"



Many times we strive to follow in the footsteps of Jesus and serve others, and we get no thank you and no acknowledgment all the work we have done.  And other times, our actions are the manifestation of God's love for hurting people.

Later that day I received this message from this grateful mom: "You will never believe what Cindy shared with me today.  THE CHURCH IS GETTING US A CAR!  … I am blessed.  I can tell God does love me and has not forgotten me."

God uses his people, his fallen chosen people, to show His love others.  But sometimes -- you just have to jump in with two feet not knowing what God has in store.


Cindy and Zane did not give up on helping others, and God has give them a way to BE blessed while BEING a blessing.

The Kennedy's have not only given help to struggling parents - they have chosen to be a blessing to the Safe Families organization as well.  Cindy's desire to help others who are struggling come from a personal place in her own life.  In 2009, Cindy's son - Jordan - passed away.  To honor his life, Cindy and Zane started up "The Jordan Bush Memorial Ride and BBQ Dinner" to give back to the community and help others in memory of their son.

Cindy said that after Safe Families came for a church presentation, she was "immediately interested and was looking for another avenue for Jordan's Ride to help. My husband and I prayed about it, talked with our church about it and we decided we wanted to be a part of this Safe Families organization.  So last year, and again this year, our charity ride is supporting Safe Families of Madison County.  We look back, and it was a horrible time in our life.  We didn't give up and we're helping other people.  And it's in his memory."





















Safe Families for Children is a 501c3 non-profit organization that operates only by earning grants, and receiving funding through churches and benevolent individuals.  Cindy and Zane's desire to bless the Safe Families ministry is a gigantic blessing!

For more information on this ride, check out the flyers, join the Facebook invite, or contact jbush@northchristianchurch.org

Click here for more information on how to become a host family, volunteer or get your church involved or contact ejohnson@safefamilies.net for information on the Safe Families movement in Madison County.



Friday, April 3, 2015

#WhyWeHost Reason #4: Because Christ Provided A Bridge To The Father

GUEST BLOGGER:  Barbie Dayberry  is the Safe Families Coordinator at College Park Church in Indianapolis.  Barbie shares her heart about hosting and College Park's One Day Training coming up this month on April 25.

The longer I've served with Safe Families, the more I’ve seen the distance between the "Haves" and the "Have-Nots” in life.  One of the supposed advantages to a comfortable life is that it can separate us from exposure to things that disturb us, make us sad, or make us fearful.  And truth be told, I love my safe life in the suburbs.  It feels so perfect. And while I’m missing the white picket fence (darn those HOA rules!), I am thankful for the comfort and safety our neighborhood provides my four small children. With that being said, I also don't want to bury myself so deep behind my metaphorical picket fence that I forget there is a hurting world on the other side of it.  That’s why I so wholly, emphatically, and passionately love Safe Families for Children ministry.  

I love it because it builds a bridge for me.  That bridge starts right outside my fence and ends right next to a family in need – a family I would’ve never seen, known, or even dreamed of before Safe Families.  I don't have to watch the news to find these families; Safe Families brings them hand-in-hand over the emotional and physical distance between us.  Yes, there is still work to be done in caring for a child that is not my own while a mother gets back on her feet again. Work that means wiping tears, making extra food, cleaning up extra toys, installing new car seats, and a myriad of other tasks that need to be fit into the margin of my already-busy life.  However, when the child’s time with me is done, we cross that same bridge again and return them to their home, which has hopefully become a better one during their time away.

Thanks to College Park, this year Safe Families is once again offering a "One Day Training" seminar on the day of SERVE|15 that allows interested families to join our ranks and cover some difficult ground in readying themselves to become a new destination for those crossing the bridge. We will be able to fingerprint, train, feed, and (as much as is possible) prepare families for the hard work of loving needy children.  These obstacles can take weeks on their own, but when we come together - we can help families get through those hurdles quickly and in good company.  For those of you who are already Safe Families or if you’re not in a season of life to host children, Safe Families is also facilitating a cleanup day during SERVE|15 for what we call our "Safe House." This project helps provide love and care for a family that Safe Families is trying to help get back on their feet. It will consist of landscaping and other house maintenance.  If you love to get your hands dirty and your heart full, this will be a great project for you!

If you have any questions about Safe Families for Children and what we do, please visit our website. I would also be happy to answer your questions.  In the meantime, I pray that all of us can find a bridge to those in need, just as Christ provided us a bridge to the Father.  As always, He will make a way.
Thank you all for your support.

-Barbie
Note: If you are in the Madison County area and are interested in attending this training or have questions, please contact Emma at ejohnson@safefamilies.net


Saturday, February 14, 2015

#WhyWeHost Reason #3: Because it is God's design

The Barker Family Story

"Our family has always been a host family in retrospect.  I believe that God has been preparing both my husband and I to host for a long time.  Even before we had our daughter Aubrey, the neighborhood children would randomly come hang out with us.  Tyler, my husband, was always outside working on something... the yard, cars or bicycles.  I often sat with him, just being there.  The neighborhood kids would stop to see what we were doing, I'd offer them a soda, and that was that.  We would have a daily visitor.


Tyler and I moved from our starter home after the birth of our daughter.  When we landed at Tyler's childhood home in the country, we thought that would be the end of the neighborhood kids.  God however has a sense of humor and at that house it was actually worse.  Now that Aubrey was two, they would come over to "play with Aubrey."  In reality, the boys would be outside with Tyler and the girls and I would be cooking, chatting, playing with Aubrey and having a good time.



As time went forward, we moved once again to our forever (we think) home.  The hustle and bustle stopped.  To me the house seemed so empty.  We only had one neighbor kid that would come over.  Tyler and I had heard of Safe Families at church and had been sitting on the idea for some time.  Now that the flow of extra children had stopped it seemed like a feasible idea.



We began the process of becoming a host family through Safe Families.  God has worked on our hearts for many years, the neighborhood kids having stories of their own.  Our first family has a story as well.  


Our first placement was unusual, it was a part-time placement that lasted for almost 7 months.  After spending so many weekends together, the children felt like a part of our family.  What an adventure we had together!  We introduced the children to camping, paddle boats, canoeing, they met our extended family, became part of our church family and our small group family.  How amazing it was to watch their confidence soar and see the love around them comfort them.



You see, we became a host family to change children and families lives.  We did, and I know that the children we hosted had a season of life that will never be taken from them.  They feel the value of who they are and know that there are many good people in this world. And that was my goal.



God, however, has a goal so much bigger than our one track minds.  While we were busy changing the children's lives, the children were busy changing the world.  Those two children changed the heart of not only myself, Tyler and Aubrey, they changed the heart of our extended family, our small group, our church family and even people whom we met camping and will never see again.  In each of these people a new idea was formed.  An idea that a person is a person, just like Horton says, no matter their circumstance, the way they look or the way they speak.  A person is a person and they are Gods children, no different.  A work has begun in the hearts of many, and this work will never be taken from them.



I want to end with this point.  Safe families is not simply about helping families in crisis.  It is Gods design of a bigger picture.  God put us on this earth to love each other.  That is Safe Families design as well.  To open your home and to love.  Cherish the change in all of us.  The whole encompassing circle around these families we serve will never again be the same, because we all now know a different way, and that can't be taken from us.


If I could list how many people have been touched just by this one family in crisis, it would begin with me and spiral all the way to that one woman in line at the grocery store that saw us interacting together and loving one another.  Her question to me from three people back in line was "Are they all yours?"  My response was, "we are a host family for Safe Families, to get more info you can Google it.  No, they are not all mine, but I sure do love them all."  A work begun...even in the line at the grocery store. Observers are around us that I will never even know, yet the seed is planted just the same.  Beautiful."



Jenn and Tyler Barker

Aubrey Barker

Thank you Jennifer, Tyler and Aubrey Barker for sharing your hearts, your home, and your Safe Families story.  To learn more about Safe Families in your area, or for more information about hosting, contact ejohnson@safefamilies.net