How Christmas Happened

There is no secret as to "how Christmas happened" for 39 children and 11 adults.  It's a smattering of volunteers and kind people who give of their time and treasure to help others.

This is my mother.  She is surrounded by gifts and looking like Mrs. Claus because she (along with a number of other volunteers that are called the Nicole Sellers Safe Family Christmas Committee) dedicated their time and energy to providing Christmas gifts to 50 adults and children this holiday season.  

Pam Nevins preparing to deliver Christmas gifts!

Phew!  It's a tough job but somebody has to do it!  

Well…actually that's not true.  No one really has to do it.  

We are fortunate to have a team of people who want to do it.  

 Gift Giving Trees

This 'Christmas Committee' was formed in the spirit of Nicole Sellers who left this earth too early and dedicated her short life to helping children.  This incredible committee consists of Nicole's mother, sister and sister-in-law: Priscilla, Dawn and Vanessa Sellers as well as Jill Keller, Cherie Ritz, Teri Weiss and Pam Nevins (aka Mrs. Claus).  These ladies made adorable trees and acquired all of the names, ages, sizes and requests for each of the families Safe Families has served in the past year, then partnered with 3 local churches and 1 credit union to provide gifts for our families.  These ladies are awesome and we are so VERY thankful for their hearts and their help!  They also made these sweet little trees to display at our partner churches which included Fall Creek Christian, Ovid Community Church and Markleville North Christian Church.

Gift Giving Trees

One such family that was blessed this year was a single mom raising a new baby and 2 young boys on her own.  This mom is starting her life fresh and moved into a new but tiny apartment just a few weeks before Christmas.  Having hardly any furniture to speak of and a 40+ work week didn't leave much time or resources to provide gifts for her children this Christmas.  Along with gifts for herself and each of her children, she was also provided with some furniture, clothing donations, and two tubs full of household items thanks to the Christmas Committee and a random bunch of people who volunteered their time, their trucks, their resources and their hearts to our families in need.

This year our Christmas Committee got some extra help rounding up all those presents.  Safe Families was fortunate to be contacted by the Independent Federal Credit Union in Anderson, asking if they could adopt some of our families for Christmas this year.  

Why, yes!  Yes you can!

Annie is a single mother working full time to support her 5 children.  The space between the bottom of her Christmas tree and her living room floor won't be so empty this year, thanks to our friends at Independent Federal Credit Union in Anderson.  IFCU sponsored three of our families this year, bringing an incredible amount of joy to these kids whose every day lives are a struggle.  After Christmas, Annie said "They absolutely adored the gifts.  Thank you all so much!"

Bobbi, Rita, Carol and many others at IFCU shopped, bought and wrapped gifts for 14 children and 4 adults this year.  This was a huge blessing, thank you for all your help IFCU!

The employees at IFCU, Anderson

That is how Christmas happened for our families in Madison County.  Is God good to us or what?  

Actually, there's one more really great story I have to share with you.  It involves a Grandmother, a 5 year old and cans.

The Friday before Christmas, a friend of mine called saying he had some good news.  I will call this person Jason Kistler in order to not protect his identity.  Jason then proceeded to tell me this story:

"My son and I were in a store, and he was wanting every toy in the store, like any 5 year old kid.  I tried to explain to him that some kids didn't get a lot of stuff for Christmas.  So he and I decided to do a fundraiser.  We collected cans and scrap metal from around town and I'm really happy to say we got over $500 in donations.  So… now we're looking for a family.  My son would really like to pick out some gifts for 1 or 2 boys and deliver them himself.  I really want him to understand that not every kid has all the things that he has.  Do you know of anyone we can help out this Christmas?"

I was so so so touched by this story.  I quickly thought of a family that would be a great fit; a family consisting of 3 children ages 6, 5 and 3 who are raised full time by their weary Grandmother.

The Tuesday before Christmas this little guy hand delivered a trunk FULL of gifts to all three of these kids.  

Hudson Kistler

Hudson's family and the 3 kids!

This Grandmother responded so sweetly saying, "I can't believe that total strangers got me gifts too…Hudson has a wonderful family.  Thank you so very much."

And THAT is how Christmas happened for our families in Madison County.  It happened the same way everything else happens -- by people stepping forward to help people.  

Thank you to our incredible Christmas Committee, Independent Federal Credit Union, and the families that stepped forward to help other families directly.  Our families were doubly blessed this Christmas!  I can't think of a better way to show others that they are loved and cared for by a good God in heaven, than showing tangible love from God's people on the birthday of the One who showed us how to love in the most excellent way.  

#WhyWeHost Reason #2: Because We Didn't Close Him Out

This host family story is special.  Rhonda and Stan Angermeier were one of the first families in Madison County to step forward and say "Yes" to the call of hosting children in their home.  I remember reading through their application, amazed at this families' story.  Early in their marriage, Rhonda and Stan decided to live below their means in order to allow space in their lives for God to use them… and has He ever used them!  Before becoming a host family, Rhonda and Stan adopted two sweet girls from China.  Their oldest daughter, Qiao, was adopted at age 4 with a diagnosis of retinoblastoma.  Much to their surprise, Qiao's eyesight deteriorated quickly and she went completely blind only 3 months after her adoption was final.  The heartache this family endured was steep, but it didn't stop them from continuing to allow God to use them and be a blessing to others.  

The Angermeier's were approved at rapid speed for a placement need that came in practically overnight.  They agreed to take in a baby for one month, but were prompted to serve two young boys instead.  After some thought, they agreed and this family became a place of peace and rest for two young boys that desperately needed it.  In their home,  they paid careful attention to the emotional needs of these boys and watched them blossom into sweet, playful children.  The space this family left in their life has been filled in ways that cannot be measured.

Stan, Allean, Rhonda & Qiao Angermeier

"Why did our family chose to be a host family?  There are so many answers to that question -- because both our daughters required some else to care for them for a time, because we understand how healthy experiences can help to heal the brain of traumatized children, because God had provided an extra room in our home…but, the main reason was because we felt God tug at our hearts and we didn't close Him out. We haven't always made that decision (the one to obey, to listen to the still small voice), but when we have, God has always blessed us.  We have learned to that to say no to God is to say no to an opportunity--an opportunity to know Him better, to learn His ways, to see His best.  Hosting two sweet little boys (even for a short time) has had an impact on us, and our children.  I've watched the prayer life of our daughters deepen as they pray for the real needs of another child.  Likewise, we have grown in our understanding and expectations of how God works.  God's call is never without a stretch, a little discomfort, but the rewards are always worth the light and momentary troubles."
--Rhonda and Stan Angermeier, Host Family

#WhyWeHost Reason #1: Because They Need Us More Than We Need Them

For each family that steps forward and says, "I want to do that.  What does it take to be a host family?"  There is usually a reason why.  The families that step up to serve others in this radical way, do what they do because God has broken their hearts.  We will be highlighting these 'reasons why' in the coming weeks.  My families' reason found us over two years ago, and since then we have allowed our home to be an open door to kids in need.  But sometimes hosting is hard.  

I read a story on a blog recently entitled, "The Child I Didn't Adopt".  It was about a boy who was a forgotten child of the foster care system.  It hit me in a spot where I can feel God trying to grow me.  It gave me compassion for those children that are particularly hard to love.

The little boy in the story mentioned above, Stephen was his name, resonated with me.  I have seen kids like him before -- they cry out for attention by being disrutptive to teachers and classmates, or maybe they throw a fit when things don't go their way.  Maybe Stephen was overly hyper, unsettled, angry and difficult.  

I resonated with his foster families too--maybe they were at a loss.  Maybe nothing was working.  Maybe they just didn't feel like he was theirs to keep.

I blubbered over this blog post because one like him was living in my home at the time.  Two weeks had come and gone with no other prospective host family, and it was becoming obvious that this child would be staying with us.  His unstable past had shown itself in all its colors.  Indignant anger lived right below his skin, and he would yell at us for the smallest of disturbances.  Tantrums in public and referral's from school were consistent--though improving.  He cried out for attention by being disruptive to his teachers and classmates.  He threw a fit when he didn't get his way.  He was overly hyper, unsettled, angry and difficult. And at the end of the day, he would pray for God to take all of his bad dreams away.

It's a stretch to love these lost boys.  All four members of my family were feeling the stretch that occurs when hosting a child whom you cannot call a blessing, while extending love and grace to his mother, whom you cannot call thankful.

Safe Families is unique in that the host family is able to build a relationship with the parent.  I was determined to build a relationship with his mother.  This child needed the love and stability of our home for now, and the long-term stability that his mother would provide for him.  And his mother needed a friend.    

The next 3 weeks would hold less tantrums, less referrals, more stickers on his chart and more push back from my family.  We were being stretched remember.

I have a strong-willed daughter, whose personality is as fierce and stubborn as a child who has endured the world's wrath.  And so, when he yells, she screams back at him.  When he stomps out of the room, she slams a door.  When he apologizes for his behavior, she mutters a mumbled "I-forgive-you-I-guess" and turns and walks away.  My son, on the other hand, is quick to forgive, and I am quick to point out that his gift of forgiveness is a blessing right now.

I have a friend pick him up from school one day; to survive this placement I must pull in my own support system.  Fortunately I have faithful friends that commit to having him for an afternoon or two while my family takes a breath.  While he is away I find that he has written to us via text message: 

"I love you.  Emma. Addi. Sam."

On his last night he hugs me with a hug that doesn't want to let go.  We pray for his new school, and praise God he can go back to his mama that loves him and needs him.  She and I will continue in relationship if I have anything to do with it.  Bare minimum, she will know that I will always be a listening ear for her.  

We are learning, as a family, that the simplest of things can be a gift to someone else.  An extra bed.  A car ride to school instead of a busy bus.  After-school snacks and homework, and enough extra time to run around a be a kid.  Friends that pick him up for a special afternoon.  A sticker chart.  Someone who stops to see him as a child of God, not as a troublemaker or a child wrought with behavioral issues due to too much instability.  

The growing pains my family endured are small in comparison to the blessing it has been to him.  Sometimes God asks us to serve others and it turns out to be a blessing for us.  And other times he asks us to serve so that we can be a blessing to someone else because ultimately, they need us more than we need them.

Right now, you have an opportunity to BE a blessing to these troubled kids that fall into our hands and our hearts by opening your home to a child in need.  Our placements are often times short, but life changing.  For more information on hosting or how you can volunteer with Safe Families, please email ejohnson@safefamilies.net

It's #GivingTuesday! Let's Keep A Good Thing Going!

Since it's #GivingTuesday, we decided to extend our campaign just ONE MORE DAY!  Any one wanting to make a tax-deductible donation to a grass-roots organization helping families in crisis can still donate!  Click on the image to the right and make a different in the lives of children and families in your community, or view the campaign on CrowdRise Here.